what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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