You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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