I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
