# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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