whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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