I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize