hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
