Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
