You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
