have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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