His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
