I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
