Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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