oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
