idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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