i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
