I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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