Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
