Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
