wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
