ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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