ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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