At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize