Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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