i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize