Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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