When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
