Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
