I wish I only lived at night.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Why are your pants in the freezer?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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