Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize