so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.