You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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