i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
