i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
