her vagine was all disorganized.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She told me I should be a condom model.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
