Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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