We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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