Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize