Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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