I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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