margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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