This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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