I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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