I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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