Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
