Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
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