I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Even my vagina gasped.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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