do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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