Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
