he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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