Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
